The Tragedy

Anger is fire which burn you inside out. The tragedy which claimed a life and left the daughter blinded occurred to a family of four in Penang.

It all started with heaty arguments between the couples over their daughter. The husband disagreed with the wife who let the daughter help her at the food stall and instead wanted her to spend more time studying.

The final argument ended when the husband splashed acid to the two of them and left the 17 year old schoolgirl permanently blinded and her mother death.

Eventhough the father surrendered himself, the girl's future is in bleak. Time would not return her the mother and her eye sights.

Was it worth to let your anger overcome you and spoiled all the things that you loved. So, in future think before you say or act as the consequences might be hard to swallow...

Control your Temper

Just had a chit chat with a friend who has to tolerate with the husband's temper. So, to my dear friend hopefully you have the strength to overcome the problem and may Allah guide you in finding the solutions.

Believe that every problem has a way out...here I wish to share lines of a poem( I think so) which was shared to me by other friend.

The strength of a man
isn't in how hard he hits
It is in how tender
he touches...

The strength of a man
isn't in the weight he can lift
It is in the burdens that he can carry

I also found an article in SDK Magazine, June 2008 which hopefully benefit us in strengthening our marital relationships.

6 ways to help husbands to control their tempers

1. Positive Thinking
Husband should always think positively. Identify your anger. Isolate the work related problems and personal problems. Never let your wife be a scapegoat and throw your anger to her when it is work related issues.

2. Treat a wife as a friend
Release your tense and stress by telling your partner on your emotional status. The wife would feel appreciated as you are willing to share with her.

3. Avoid Punishing Oneself
Be rational. Don't put the blame on yourself or others. A wife is for you to care and love.

4. Tell the Truth
Honesty is the best policy. Don't hide your problem from your wife especially the one involves financial. Sit down and discuss on the problem and try to come up with solutions.

5. BedtimeUse the opportunity to thanks and apologise to your partner.

6. AblutionsPut the fire off with ablutions.

Also, it is good to look in my previous article "Taming your Temper" September 2009.

Taming Your Temper

This article is extracted from Reader's Digest October 2009 issue. Very interesting and benefits our daily life on how to effectively manage our anger...anger is like fire ... explosive character which jeopardise our health, work and relationships. So, here are 10 tips how to get anger under control.

ExercisePhysical exertion can help for brief, short term anger, says Dr Sarah Edelman, psychologist and author of Change Your Thinking

Write a letter Express your anger in words and keep the letter to yourself.

Cool offAvoid confrontation with the person straightaway.

Don't throw a tantrumIt's a popular myth that venting anger is always the best strategy but in actual fact, it cause more harm than good. It also impair good relationship and distort kids perception.

CommunicateSlow down and think what you want to say. Explain that you feel angry about something rather than acting aggressively. Key action is to carefully listen to the other party before responding.

Use humourBelieve that this is most effective solution...twist the situation into laughing stock...

Seek alternativesAnother way to approach the problematic environment which leads to positive results.

Pros and consWeigh and balance the situation yourself...does anger benefits everybody...

Problem-solveClose file and move on with your life.

AcceptanceAccept any situation as it is.